Year in review...2009

Ok...so being that this is the last day of 2009, let me recap what my past year has been like…
1. I started this year by being engaged…ugh! With a looming wedding date in 8 months…I was trying to figure out how to call that off…
2. My 29th b-day was nothing spectacular, but I guess any b-day above ground should be celebrated, right?
3. Viva-Las Vegas trip in February was awesome!!! So much fun was had with the Murray’s and Laura tagging along…Laura’s husband Chris had to cancel the trip because of work requirements…so it was left to me to be the “fill in husband”! I JOKE! But seriously, as recent as X-mas eve night, we were STILL talking about some of the stuff we had gotten into to and how much fun we had.
4. It wasn’t a week after I had gotten back from our Vegas trip that my fiancé called off the wedding and moved out. Insert sigh of relief! My only regret here is that she could’ve told me before I went to Vegas! I still haven’t gone there single!!!
5. Then at the end of February I started my health kick…my goal to lose 30 lbs before I was 30…which I surpassed, a thank you! LOL! I basically just ran my fat belly off!
6. March was the Seether/Nickelback/Saving Abel Concert...ROCK!
7. Around April timeframe I was introduced the Twisted Sister. You’ll have to go back and read about her.
8. In May was the kickass Keith Urban concert! That was a very good time, also spent with the Murray's and Laura...Chris absent again! I'm seeing a pattern here! I joke! I joke!
9. Also in May I won my first election…President of P-burg Aerie # 2307 of the Fraternal Order of Eagles…hopefully the first of many public/private elections I embark in?!?!?
10. In June I met Fairmont girl...again, you can go back and read about her. I basically spent my whole summer wrapped around this chick’s finger.
11. In July I started my Masonic training. I can't talk about it! LOL
12. In October I was raised to Master Mason. Also, Fairmont girl and I called it quits! The games were getting too difficult to enjoy. Chalk another one up to summer romance.
13. Also had an interesting Physic reading at the end of October and booked my Cruise!!!
14. November and December have been pretty decent for me. Once I booked my cruise for my 30th B-day, I have been focusing on getting in better shape and staying single.
Well, that about covers it. 2009 will definitely go down in history as a big year for me…be it bad or good! ;-)
Thanks for reading!

Happy New Year!!!

Happy New Year to you all! I hope your 2010 is better than your 2009 was!!!
If you have nothing to do tonight, and in the P-burg area, come on down to the Eagles club. We have 2 bands tonight, Jinx'd (rock) and Silverthorne (country) playing in two separate areas...so feel free to bounce back and forth. We will have party favors (hats, decorations, etc.) and breakfast will be served at 1 am. All included in your $20 ticket. OH - yes that may sound expensive, but you can also bring your own alcohol, beer, food, etc. So you'll actually save money if you come out and party with me tonight!
If you don't want to bring anything, the kitchen and bars will be open to serve you!
I hope to see those of you there that can make it!
If not - Have A HAPPY and SAFE New Year!!!

New Home???

Well...this may be my new home next year! I just submitted my resume for a job working for the VA in Austin, Texas!!!
Wish me luck!!! ;-)
I really haven't decided for sure that I would take the job if offered...but I think my life is in need of change and since I really have no ties here (wife/kids), I might as well go and live my life!
Plus...maybe getting out of WV again will better my life in ways I can't imagine. I definately came back to WV better than when I left (for the military). Maybe I need more time to experience the world before I settle down for good in P-burg, WV!!!
Make no mistake about it...if I do leave, I will be back!!!

Too easy to love?

Ok...maybe I'm just a little crazy here...I need guidance!
For the third time in just a few months I've been told by a woman that I was "too easy to love".
Not a bad thing right? Most would consider this is a compliment. Well, I would think so too...
Oh but wait...what if I told you that the women that have told me this were my EX's?
Doesn't sound much like a compliment, now does it?
Basically this is the number one reasons I've been given as to why a few of my relationships had ended (from way back to Crystal...to as recent as Fairmont).
Are they flipping mad? I mean honestly! I'm SO SORRY I wasn't the cheating, beating, drug using, and no job bums that these women were used to dating. And in most cases those girls are back to dating the same guys that they trashed talked, told me they hated, would never be with again in a million years, etc., etc. etc.
So these women, all of whom I treated great and would've given the world, didn't like what I had to offer at the time because "too easy to love" was just TOO EASY for them I guess??? So they go back to their jerks...and then after I move on, I start hearing from them again.
Wonderful...Do I really look like a DOORMAT?
I know what's going on here...these women realize that they let something good pass through their fingers and now they are hoping to get another glimpse. Or maybe, they are just looking for another few weeks of feeling special again, and then they'll go back to their jerks. But momma didn't raise no fool...fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me!
To all of my women friends out there...please don't male bash in front of me anymore. I mean, look at what I've been going through over the last few years! These women are driving me crazy. Should I just go into perpetual bachelor mode? Just have my fun with them when they are looking to be put up on that pedestal again?
This isn't what I've been about...I've been looking for Mrs. Right now for like 8 years. I know as soon as I go into bachelor mode, Mrs. Right will come in and I won't even notice her.
But how do I work on NOT being "too easy to love"?
Do I really want too???
I will be very interested in comments to this post...please feel free!!! ;-)

Here's to...

My family & friends: I love you so much!!! Thank you for always being there...your advice, opinions, assistance, or just listening to me rant...has helped me through the ups and downs of this year. I need you in my life so much more than I will ever admit.

The new friends I've met this year: I thoroughly enjoyed meeting you. I am hopeful that we will continue to be friends for years to come.

The girl friends (ex's) that have came and gone: Everything happens for a reason and something's just aren't meant to be. I wish you nothing but the very best!!!

And...I wish you ALL a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

I hope 2010 brings you ALL the happiness and good fortune that you deserve!!!

Just cause...

The turnout was light for the Poker game on Friday at the Eagles. I think the approaching snow storm and the X-mas holiday season contributed to the lower numbers.

Nonetheless 30 or so of us played and I was the bubble boy...it was the farthest I had managed to make it at the Eagles tourneys in quite awhile. Congrats to Shuman for taking down the top spot and the $270 in cash!!!

Saturday I managed to get in two workouts. I had to take a break after Frank and I were done with chest and go to the chiropractor. Then I went back to the gym to finish off my legs and ran for 30 minutes. I really should book a cruise every year! It definitely has motivated me!!! Both to get more in shape and stay single!!! Saturday evening was some good quality family time with the cousins and their kids.

Sunday was the annual Eagle's Officers and Employees X-mas party!!! OPEN BAR baby!!! ;-) I'm paying for it today though! Much appreciate to my buddy Brian for picking Chris and I up and giving us a ride home! Better to be safe than sorry...and it's awesome to have friends and family that you can depend on!

Today I finally broke down and scheduled a doctor's appointment to take a look at my shoulder. I think I have either a pinched nerve or a rotary cuff problem. Either way...I'm in pain and I'm not able to work out as hard or as often as I want!

It's just my luck too! Why is it when you're fat and lazy you're happy...as soon as you try to make serious adjustments to better your health then you're in pain and unable to focus! LMAO! Oh well...

The snow was awesome to see this weekend! I wonder if we'll actually have a WHITE X-mas for the first time in years???

I hope you all have a great X-mas!!! Enjoy the time spend with your family and friends!!! ;-)

Poker Tournament

The last Eagle's Poker Tournament of the year is scheduled for this Friday, December 18th, at 7:00 pm.

Registration starts at 6:00 pm. $25 buy-in ($20 – tourney/$5 – all-in chip)

We had a record number of 54 players last month! Thanks to all who was able to make it! This tournament has continued to grow and I'm appreciative to all the "regulars" that make it out to play every month.

I hope to see you all there! And good LUCK!!!

SICK Poker

I am watching last nights Poker After Dark. This week they are having a cash game.

In what has to be the sickest waste of money I've ever seen...5 players (Dwan, Ivey, Hansen, Negreanu, and Antonius) all put $100,000 CASH into the pot BEFORE any cards are dealt to them. The the dealer deals them their hole cards and they flipped their cards up and ran the flop, turn, and river. Patrick Antonius' A-5 takes it down with the board 5-7-J-3-J (for two-pair Ace kicker). $500,000 POT in the DARK!!!

These guys have WAY WAY WAY too much money!!!

Still going down...

Well...as of yesterday I'm 36 pounds lighter than when I started this whole diet/workout trend back in February...that's over 16% weight loss!!! ;-) Who needs the Biggest Loser anyways???

It has all been honest too! Just dieting and running. For the last two weeks, "Frank the Tank" and I have been hitting the gym for some free weight action...so I expect my weight to eventually start going in the opposite direction (muscle weighs more than fat). My goal is and always has been to be in the best shape of my life for my 30th birthday...but of course now it has a purpose and that is to have a great bod for the cruise!!!

In other news...I think I'm finally on the down slope of my cold. This was a weird one...albeit I brought most of it on myself. I probably should've skipped my buddy's house party Saturday night, all the smoke just made my cold worse. I spent Sunday and Monday trying to recover. Tuesday was pretty much a redo of how I felt Saturday (which wasn't too bad)...so today is really the first day where my energy is back up and I have felt better.

Well...that's it for now. I gotta head to the Y and jump on the treadmill for a quick 10 minute warm-up and then Tank and I are hitting the chest and legs today! Legs are the only exercise where I have an advantage over him! ;-) He whines like I do during the chest exercises.

Peace out!!!

Relationship Recap - Crystal

Wow, the blog ideas just keep coming to me.

This one actually came from an ex of mine. She wanted to hear the story that I told my future girl friends about our relationship after we broke-up. So I think this may be the first in a series of "Relationship Recaps" that I will be posting. Let me know if you find this boring or you are uninterested and I will think of other things to write about.

This one is entitled "Crystal" for a reason...not because that was her name, no where close. It's because that is where I first laid eyes on her. But I'm getting ahead of myself...let me lay out the ground work.

I was eating lunch with my Aunt and Uncle at the Crystal Cafe on Market Street. This B-E-A-UUUUtiful woman walks in and I'm sure my jaw just dropped. She had long - strait, brown hair, was tall, slender and extremely attractive...if memory serves me correctly she was wearing a long red coat. I'm not saying that it was love (lust) at first sight...but I haven't felt quite like that before...and I was hoping to feel more! ;-)

I had to leave lunch early to get back to work. Later that evening my Aunt calls me and says "That girl's name is “Crystal”. She has 1 daughter and is in the process of getting a divorce". I guess her Aunt was the waitress there and my Aunt got the scoop for me!

So I met my normal crew there for lunch a few more times. I probably only saw Crystal there once or twice in the 2 weeks since first seeing her. But man...I couldn't help but fall head over heals for her. After a week or 2, I came in to meet my Aunt and her friend Rita there for lunch. Crystal was sitting by herself in the corner.

My Aunt says "Her Aunt says that she will go out with you if you go and ask her out". I think Rita about passed out when I IMMEDIATELY stood up and walked over to Crystal's table, introduced myself, and started a conversation with her. She was easy to talk to, but I'm sure my face matched her red jacket. I was so nervous! That was the first time in my life I had ever done anything like that – and honestly, I still haven’t been that bold again. I never would have before with a girl like that...she just seemed out of my league.

I got her phone number and called her that night. We talked for a few more days and then went to eat at the Olive Garden the following weekend. Could this be the girl of my dreams? That kept running through my head. ANSWER was no! But, let’s get into the why…

There were days that I would hear from Crystal regularly. Then there were days that I wouldn’t hear from her at all. Then there would be days (weekdays) that I would get a call at 2 in the morning telling me that she’s on her way over. It seemed like she wanted a relationship with me, but also her freedom to do anything else she wanted…more on that later.


So I pulled all the nice guy tricks out on her. I knew she had been married to a jerk that didn’t appreciate her. In my book she was a princess and I was going to show her how she should have been treated.

Here’s an example of something I did, but you can’t hold this against me! I don’t want to lose any player points (just kidding). I’m not this sweet anymore…for obvious reasons… it gets you nowhere! ;-) Despite what you women may say, you do not want a nice guy like this. Don’t even try to argue with me! ;-) Anyhow…

It was around January, very cold outside – maybe 25 degrees. I got off of work early and went and picked her up a dozen roses. I was all dressed up (suit and tie with a long, black trench coat). I went to her work and stood outside her window. I called her and was chatting with her. I asked her if it looked cold outside, she said she didn’t know. I told her to look and see. You should’ve seen the smile on her face when she looked out and there I stood holding a dozen red roses for her.

Have you ever been so happy with someone that NOTHING else matters? BUT there is something in the pit of your stomach that is telling you something is wrong? Did I listen to it, of course not! Was I right, yes, but …I’m saving all of that for the end.

Eventually my nice guy routine turned into that “well are we dating or not” guy. I’m no sucker, and if she wasn’t interested in a serious relationship, then I needed to focus my time elsewhere. Basically, I gave her an ultimatum…either we are seriously dating or we are over. She chooses for it to be OVER!

So this should be the end of the blog right? I mean, I gave it my best shot with Crystal and it just wasn’t going to work out. OH NO! There’s more to this complex story…

So I spend the next few weeks trying to get Crystal out of my head. You know what I mean…every time the doorbell rings or my cell phone rings she’s the first person that I thought it could be. So much mental focus and energy is spent thinking about someone that doesn’t want you! Why do we do this to ourselves? But I digress…

So about 3 weeks later she calls me. [This story has so many similarities with Fairmont girl…I wonder if they were sisters in a previous life??? Click HERE for a recap.] She wants to “talk”. So we meet for lunch and she basically does a 180 degree spin on what she “wants.” She WANTS a relationship with me, WANTS to be my girlfriend, WANTS there to be an US. Now, was there that pit of the stomach feeling again – something was wrong? YES! Did I listen to it? Of course NOT!

So at this point I have the girl I always wanted. And I think life is good again. I start letting my guard down and allowing myself to fall in love. All is well for a few weeks. That is until one weekend she tells me that through some legal loophole, her ex-husband was forcing her to meet him ½ ways between here and Illinois to drop off their daughter. Warning bells were going off in my head. I didn’t want her to go alone.

I hate it SOOOO much when guys use their kids to get to their ex’s. Be it to get even with them and piss them off, or to try to get back together because they had their fun and saw that the grass wasn’t greener on the other side. Well that’s exactly what Crystal fell into.

She didn’t call me at all that weekend...fell off the map so to speak…comes to find out she fell into bed with her ex! I heard from her the following Monday. To her credit, she came by and confessed to sleeping with her ex. Said she still had feelings for him, yada…yada…yada. I was so pissed that I even left my OWN home while she was sitting there trying to explain! LOL

She caught up with me later and told me that she still loved her ex. I said and what about me? “I love you too”. I remember thinking WTF! How do you love two people (as a mate)? I still will never understand that! I loved Crystal…she had all of my love…all of my heart...so I guess I was naïve in thinking that I was going to get out of the relationship what I put into it.

So, I pretty much cut all contact off from Crystal. I didn’t deserve being treated that way and I eventually would be able to move on. So we’re at the point in the blog where, yet again, you think that this should be the end of the story, right? Sorry, LOL, there is more…

Fast forward a few more weeks and Crystal calls me yet again. She’s pregnant!!! She wants to know what I want to do. I said something along the lines of “well, as soon as I know it’s mine, then I’ll support you and be there for you”. She of course insisted that they baby was mine and said “I can’t do this alone!” My smartass came through…”You’re not alone, you have your ex!”

Disclaimer – I am not the type of guy that ditches his responsibilities…this girl cheated on me and I wasn’t going to support her for 9 months and then find out that the baby doesn’t belong to me. She dug her grave! If she never cheated on me…and then she got prego from a faithful relationship with me…I would’ve stepped up and done what was right!

I hear from Crystal’s mom a few weeks later that she had an abortion. I’m not going to get into a drawn out explanation about how I felt here…basically because all the facts were not known to me at the time…saving it for the blog’s conclusion.

So, once again, I should be done hearing or seeing Crystal right? Well…about three or four weeks later I’m sitting at home. Crystal was out of my head and I was getting on with my life. Then comes the Ding Dong of the door bell. It’s Crystal…she asks to come in. Dumbfounded I let her in.

She brings chocolate covered strawberries and a gift for me (Season 2 of Smallville). She says she wants to be friends. My response was “Would you want to be friends with someone that treated you the way you treated me?” She said no. We argued back and forth…but the love was gone from me and I think she saw it. She eventually left and that was the last I thought I would ever hear from Crystal.

And then…let’s really spice up this story. So about 6 months later my cousin runs into Crystal at Wal-mart. She’s PREGNANT! Of course my cousin calls me and gets my mind racing about whether or not this kid is mine or not. But I never contacted Crystal or her mother. I figured the truth would come out one day…and if she wanted a happy life with her husband (not and ex anymore) then who was I to get in the way.

So I spent the next few years comparing just about every girl I dated to Crystal. Sick, I know…but at that point she was my most attractive girl friend…at that point. Life has been good to me the last few months…but that’s another blog.

So you’ll remember that I decided to bury the hatchet and not hold any grudges against any of my ex’s. I sent them all friend’s requests and basically said “I’m not looking for a round 2 or 3…just wanna be friends…accept if you’re cool with it…deny if you’re not”.

Well Crystal was the first to accept. We chatted several times over the next few days and she was even coming in from out of town for the Thanksgiving break. She even stopped by to talk and see what I had done with the place. She was who I went to see New Moon with (see Think About It blog).

It was nice to hear her side of things…for example: that gut feeling where I always felt something was wrong…well I wasn’t being paranoid! She was cheating on me within the first few weeks of dating! Now, most people would be mad at hearing that…but I was actually relieved! Here I thought I was never going to be able to trust someone based off of my feelings and in this case my feelings were RIGHT!!!

Oh, and she didn’t have an abortion…the baby didn’t have a heart beat, so it was never meant to be. And the future baby of hers will be celebrating her 5th birthday in March…which puts her outside of my “window” of opportunity! ;-)

Other than that…we just talked about the old times. It’s funny what she remembers about our relationship and what I have forgotten. It was also ironic that she was also thinking about me at times…even drove by my house a few times…and checked my blog out once and awhile.

Here I had spent most of my adult life thinking that all of my ex’s had moved on with their lives and I was doomed to repeat the same mistakes. In reality…I have learned from a few of my mistakes and I don’t regret anything from my past! All my ex’s have been wonderful learning experiences…what I like…what I don’t like…and what I hope never to come across again!

I wonder if they feel the same? ;-)

Thanks for reading this insanely long blog!!!

Welcome to my new blog!!!

Okay, this is cool...

I spent the afternoon copying all my myspace blog posts over into my new blog. I have really enjoyed this "online" diary of mine and thought I'm appreciative of myspace, I wanted to open my blog up to everyone!

I'm still working on the format, pictures, etc. If you have any suggestions, I would appreciate it!

Thanks for dropping by...I gotta go post one last post of myspace telling everyone that they need to start coming to this site!!!

Thought about it!

Okay...quickie post just to clear things up.

I heard from some of you that read my last blog "Think about it". I guess it must have come across with some mixed signals.

I had a brief moment where I was thinking about the past! That's it! I was watching a movie with a ex (now friends) whom I hadn't seen in 5 years. I was also thinking about what my last ex was thinking about during certain scenes from the movie. Call me crazy...my mind tends to roam! Plus, there is nothing wrong with self-reflection, is there? I'm really trying to learn from my mistakes and move forward.

Truth is, my life is great! I have awesome friends and family. I'm active in the community (Eagles & Masons). I have a great job! I can pretty much do and go where ever I want. I really shouldn't be complaining...and I wasn't.

So of all the things that COULD go wrong, I guess I would want it to be my romantic relationships. Let's be honest, it's easier for me to replace a f'd up relationship than it is a close and dear friend or family member...Or to win election as the President of the Eagles...Or become a Mason...Or get the job I have.

But right now...I am actually enjoying my time alone. 42 more days and I'll have all the fun and excitement I can handle!!!

Hope this clears things up!

Think about it!

This time my blog inspiration comes form Darius Rucker's "Don't think I don't think about it" and the movie New Moon.

The song lines that struck me were:
"Don't think I don't think about it,
Don't think I don't have regrets,
Don't think you don't get to me,
Between the work and the hurt and the whiskey"

I really enjoyed watching New Moon yesterday afternoon. I had trouble keeping my mind focused on the movie instead of relating my own past experiences to those of the character Jake. Don't worry, I'm not going to provide any spoilers here...

In the movie Jake is fighting for the love of a woman (Bella) that is hopelessly in love with someone else. I have been in this situation so many times that it was actually kind of hard to watch. Especially when Bella was being selfish and ONLY spending time with Jake so that the hurt in her heart would have time to heal. This of course wasn't fair to Jake because he thought that she actually wanted to spend time with him. Who does Jake go to in order to heal his heart?

Many times have I been in this situation...rebound guy so to speak. Women will say "I" just want to be friends, but then eventually pushes or wants more. Then, as if they have waited JUST for me to fall in love with them, they run back to the one that hurt them in the first place. I think sometimes, the women just want to see if they "still have it". Other times, maybe they didn't expect to fall so fast for another person (me)...then that scares them back into their comfort zones...usually the ex! ;-) Again...who does Jake (me) go to in order to heal his heart?

So...going forward what should I do? Not be so easily loved? Maybe not fall in love so quickly? But what happens if I come across Mrs. Right and I'm so closed off and cold that she passed me right by? Like Jake, I can't take the pain anymore. Life is too short and love should be something that I look forward to, instead of fear!!!

And I do fear love right now, or at least the hurt that is left once it's gone! Have I already met Mrs. Right and she will come back into my life? Here's where the song lyrics come in. Yes, I do think at times that maybe things could've been different. Maybe I do have regrets. And sometimes it does get to me (like sitting and watching New Moon).

But I still have to hold onto the belief that things happen for a reason. Like I said in my previous posts, I'm not holding any grudges towards my ex's...and I hope that I can be friends with them again. However, I feel that I may be taking one step forward and two steps back if I went down any of those roads again...at least romantically.

In closing I'll just say: Who do I go to in order to heal my heart??? I can't keep taking the hurt...and honestly, I don't think I deserve to!

But don't think I don't think about it!!!

Thanks for reading!!!

Liquid courage???

Okay, so tonight was an interesting night...

I'm really trying to figure this out in my head...what it all means, why it's happening, etc.

We went out for Big Red's b-day party tonight and ended up at the Thirsty Turtle to listen to Sound Theory. Awesome band and they played a lot of Godsmack, Shinedown, and Seether! I definitely recommend!!!

I wasn't drinking tonight...hence the subject "Liquid Courage"...or should I say lack there of. Actually I haven't been drunk in over two weeks...for reasons that I'm not going into here, at least not yet. Let's just say that I'm enjoying waking up without a hang-over, enjoying this extra energy that I have, and enjoy the fact that I now know that I can still party with my friends without being drunk. Razz me as they may! LOL

So the crowds there tonight were normal for that bar. The one cute girl that was dancing with her boyfriend had a rockin' body, but she was missing her two front teeth! LOL - I'm not joking! ;-)

We were there to celebrate Red's b-day, so I really didn't mind the lack of eye-candy. But as the hours grew later, the scenery improved dramatically...and NO it wasn't the beer goggles, because I was only drinking water or Busch NA (non-alcoholic).

About an hour into the bands set (about 11) this b-e-a-utiful blonde walks in with her two girl friends. She's petite, sexy, cute ass...all the things that I go for. My jaw dropped several times while she was rocking/dancing to the band...definitely someone that I would've loved to have a night out with, if you catch my drift.

Sadly I can't tell you her name. Frank was trying to get me to go buy her a drink...but I just shrugged him off. Sure, I wanted too, but something didn't feel right. Was this something my LACK of "liquid courage"? I don't know...and I sure hope not. ;-(

So I watched from afar. There wasn't any doubt that this chick was my type (sexually)...but she had trouble written all over her. She immitted drama and frustration. Does that make sense? NOW the drunk Jr. would've only had one thing on his mind and it wouldn't have mattered what drama I would've had to put up with. SOBER Jr. however, wanted to give it some time to see what this chick was all about.

I'm glad I did...she wasn't there 15 minutes and had 2 girls ready to kick her ass! LOL. With the band playing as loud as it was, it was hard to decern what exactly was going on, but those girls didn't like her very well, that's for sure. As I figured, something wasn't right with her...drama queen for sure! After everything settled down, this chick was up on the dance floor, by herself, just dancing and rocking like she was taunting those two girls...and those girls were sitting in chairs not two feet from her, facing the dance floor - staring her down, if only looks could kill! So she obviously liked the drama and causing shit. True, I don't know the whole story, but my gut was dead on! D-R-A-M-A queen!

So after seeing all of this, why don't I feel better? OH, that's cause I'm home alone now writting on a blog! LOL. NO, that's not it, I'm just joking. My gut told me something, and for once I was sober enough to listen to it. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks! ;-)

I guess my fear is that without liquid courage I won't be able to approach women again. Yes, I know it shouldn't matter...and I guess it eventually won't. I haven't met all of my ex-girlfriends while I was drinking...but the last few have been in bars...and we see how those have worked out! LOL. But then again, the ones I have met at places like restuarants and cafes haven't fared any better. Go figure!

So the jury is still out on this one...I just really don't know what to think about the whole situation.

Confused and going to bed! Good night all...thanks for reading.

After 30???

As all you faithful blog followers will know, I recently booked a cruise for my 30th b-day in January.

Of course I am excited beyond words! This has given me the motivation to get into the gym and start seriously working out...and more importantly has convinced me to stay single for the next two months! ;-)

But...

Someone asked me the other day what I was planning for after my cruise. Great question and though I managed to produce a semi-thought out answer, I decided it needed more thought.

What lies ahead for me in my "next 30 years"? I really don't know. ;-(

Sure, I could give the standard answer which is "start a family" but I've been saying that for years now...and no matter how hard I may WANT it to happen, it's only going to happen when all the conditions are right! But I digress...

I guess after the cruise I will still continue to hit the gym...in preparation for a yet unscheduled beach trip next summer.

Of course I still have my Presidential duties at the Eagles to attend to until June when the new sucker, I mean President, is elected! ;-)

Other than that, I really don't know. Work will be busy around May/June and it may include some travel to DC. Always nice to get out of town.

I might put in for a job at another Agency that would require that I moved to Texas. From what I hear, Austin would be an awesome place to live.

I also promised myself to learn to play the guitar...though that has been put on the back burner in place of 2-hour gym excursions. ;-( But I'm sure it will be worth it when I get on the cruise boat! LOL

Of course, I guess I will start looking for a steady girl friend again, after the cruise of course...maybe even after the beach trip. I guess I just have to see what options are available! LOL

Honestly though, it's actually nice not having my immediate future planned out. I don't have to stress over anything! This would be the first time in a LONG time that I can just focus on me and not be worrying about everyone else.

So in closing! Take a moment and ponder your future! I hope it goes how you desire!

LATER!

A to Z about me!

A
- Available: Yes
- Age: 29
- Annoyance: People who think they are better than me
- Animal: Mongoose (kills snakes)

B
- Beer: Michelob Ultra
- Birthday: January 23rd
- Best Friends: Are rare and should be held onto
- Body Part on opposite sex: Ass
- Best feeling in the world: Feeling wanted
- Blind or Deaf: Deaf
- Best weather: Fall
- Been on stage?: Yes
- Believe in Magic: No
- Believe in Santa: I did

C
- Candy: Reese's Cups (frozen)
- Chocolate/Vanilla: Chocolate
- Chinese/Mexican: Chinese
- Cake or pie: Pie
- Continent to visit: Australia

D
- Day or Night: Night
- Dance in the rain: Sure

E
- Eyes: Blue
- Everyone's got: Assholes and Opinions
- Ever failed a class?: Yes (9th grade) - I was never there

F
- Full name: Ronald Dean Ruble Junior
- First thoughts waking up: Time for work already?
- Food: Steak

G
- Greatest Fear: Dying alone
- Gum: Trident
- Get along with your parents?: My mom

H
- Hair Color: Blonde
- Height: 6'2"
- Happy: Getting better
- Holiday: New Years
- How do you want to die: In my sleep

I
- Ice Cream: Strawberry
- Instrument: Learning the guitar (slowly)

J
- Jewelry: Titanium

K
- Kids: 0
- Kickboxing or karate: Karate
- Keep a journal?: Isn't this what the blog is?

L
- Longest Car Ride: WV to FL
- Love: May never find me...but I'll still look
- Letter: X
- Laughed so hard you cried: All the time

M
- Milk flavor: Chocolate ONLY
- Movies: Horror, Action and Comedy
- Motion sickness?: One time in Vegas...but I blame the booze
- McD’s or BK: NEITHER! Wendy's and Sonic!

N
- Number of Siblings: 2
- Number of Piercings: 1
-Number: 23

O
- One wish: Find someone that will put into a relationship as much as I do

p
- Perfect Pizza: PapaJohn's supreme replace onions with banana peppers and replace green peppers with mushrooms
- Pepsi/Coke: Diet Pepsi

Q
- Quote: "The best way to get over someone is to get on top of someone else!"

R
- Reason to cry: Loss
- Reality T.V.: Apprentice
- Radio Station: Rock & Country
- Roll your tongue in a circle?: Yes

S
- Song: "Don't Ever Leave" Smile Empty Soul
-Shoe size: 11.5
- Salad Dressing: Hidden Valley Ranch
- Sushi: Negatory
- Skipped school: Whenever I could
- Slept outside: Sure
- Smoke?: On occasions...cigars
- Skinny dipped?: Oh yeah! ;-)
- Shower daily?: Sometimes twice
- Sing well?: I've been told I do
- In the shower? Certainly
- Swear?: All the time
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Both
- Time for bed: Work nights...11ish
- Thunderstorms: LOVE THEM

U
- Unpredictable: Relationships

V
- Vacation spot: V is for Vegas baby! ;-)

W
- Weakness: My mouth
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: I really can't think of one...everyone is different
- Who makes you laugh the most: Brian or Tracey
- Worst feeling: Loneliness
- Wanted to be a model? Yeah...when I was in the Army I was working out 2 hours a day...wanted to be an underwear model! lol
- Where do we go when we die?: Graveyard or Crematory
- Worst Weather?: HOT and DRY

X
-X-Rays: A few
-Ex's: SO MANY...couldn't even give you a number

Y
-Year it is now: 2009
-Yellow: Summer color

Z
- Zoo animal: Lion

JR. - 5

Well I never actually expected much from my new outlook on relationships (read previous post). Honestly, it just felt right for me to let go of all the anger and hate and finally forgive people.

So I did that and send out a few friends request both on here and Face Book. I was curious how it was going to be taken. I fully expected some of them to think that I was looking for a Round 2 (or 3 in some cases). That wasn't what I was wanting. I just wanted to clear the air...get all of the demons off my chest. Live and let live...etc.

So that the next time I run into one of my ex's, there won't be any tension, hard feelings, or anger. After all, at one point or another I cared for most of them. In most cases we had in depth conversations about "our" future, goals, etc. So in a way, most of them know me better than some of my friends do.

One friend I heard back from has really opened my eyes to this whole forgive and forget mentality...for the better. I dwelled over that relationship for many years...even while I was other relationships. That wasn't healthy...or fair to my girl friend at that time.

So what I've learned is that the "JR. - 5" (Jr. from 5 years or so ago) wasn't as crazy as he thought. Some of the things that didn't feel right, and he ignored, WERE NOT right...LOL. Other things that he believed, we just lies. I've learned things about my relationships that I didn't know, things that would've made it much easier for me to move on, but not necessarily good at the time to know. I've also learned that I made better impressions that I thought...that was a good confidence booster. This whole experience has opened up my eyes for the better!

But it's also comforting to hear from the other side of my relationships. I've never really sat and thought about how my ex's felt or currently feel after a break up. I always assumed they moved on with their life and were happy with the boy friends/husbands that they found and he's poor "JR. - 5" still looking for Ms. Right.

In reality, I guess some of these ex's had just as much problem getting over our relationships than I did. They would avoid the shared places we hung out. The would drive by my house to see what I was doing. They may think of me when a certain song comes on, or when a certain movie is playing, or smell a certain colgne/perfume. Whatever it was...I WAS probably doing the same.

Realizing this will make it much easier to get over any future relationships that end sour. HOPEFULLY, that won't happen, but come on...let's look at my track record! LOL...I wouldn't even bet on me! ;-)



Thanks for reading everyone...take care!

Time slips away...

I wasn't feeling in my normal ROCK mood today, so I selected the old country playlist and just mellowed out while I was working. After a few hours into the day and the iPhone plays George Jone's "Funny How Time Slips Away". And something just hit me - and hit me HARD!

Here's the verse that really got me into a retrospective mode:
"How's your new love? I hope that he's doing fine!"

For some reason I have played that verse over and over in my head for the past few hours...so much so that I thought I would make it my next blog entry! Lucky you! ;-)

I guess I should explain to you my phases for ending or getting over a relationship:

1st - DENIAL: I could see all of the signs that a relationship was heading the wrong way or wasn't what I wanted, but I still chose to continue on. I'm not sure why, but this leads me to my next phase:

2nd - ANGER: Not just at my ex (if it was deserved) but also at myself for not seeing the signs or falling into the same trap that I had before (fool me once and all that). Sure, I was still angry at the ex. The Jr. from 10 years ago would try to get even somehow by trying to ruin their current relationship or some other crazy get-even scheme. But honestly, that didn't help ME with anything. Eventually I would head into what used to by my last phase:

3rd - MOVE-ON: I guess the best way to explain this phase is to tell you about a quote I heard on my favorite show Nip/Tuck for next week's episode: "The best way to get over someone is to get on top of someone else". And that basically how I would get over my serious relationships. Looking back I realize that bouncing from relationship to relationship was my own personal version of Hell. I lost a little bit of myself during/after each one. I hope that one day it all comes back. So those are basically the phases of my life after ending a relationship...repeated over and over again over the last 10 years or so. Yes, I know...a little sad. That's not the reason I'm writing about it though. After listening to that song today I realized that I'm actually at a new phase. A phase I've never been at in my life before - EVER! That phase is:

4th - FORGIVENESS: In the past, I never was the type of person to stay in contact with my ex's. I always looked at it like this: they are an EX for a reason! In reality, that was just ME holding onto anger (2nd phase) and never really moving-on in my 3rd phase. Anger was also my defense mechanism...it was easier to be mad than to forgive.

Well, I am now at a new phase in my life. I am willing to forgive all the liars, cheaters, and such that I have dated in my past. They all had their reasons...and it really doesn't matter if I ever know what they were. I am done thinking that every relationship was a waste of my time....INSTEAD...they were opportunities for me to learn what I want/don't want, what makes me happy/unhappy, and what I want/don't want for my future.

I have this ODD sense of peace. Have I really been holding all of this hate and anger in for so long? I guess I have...and I am never going to be able to have a meaningful relationship until I am at peace with my past and WHO I am. After all, my past relationships have made me who I am...at least with regards to "Boyfriend Jr". Now I need to learn to take the best out of each of those relationships and apply it to Mrs. Right...at least when I ever meet her! ;-)

So in closing...if you were an ex of mine, I wish you all of the best. I harbor no hard feelings towards you or your current love, and if I ever see you or hear from you again I'll politely ask: "How's your new love? I hope that he's doing fine!"

WOW! I feel FREE now! Is that weird? I I'll be interested in some of your comments...take care! ;-)

Long...everything

Hey all...I hope you had a better day than I did.

I had to work about 14 hours today and I'm looking at about 12 tomorrow. It's odd though, because today went by quicker than my normal work days. I'm sure we all can agree, the quicker work SEEMS to go by, the better!

I had a pretty good weekend; I hope you all did too. Like I said in my last post, I played poker at the Yanok's house on Friday (2 games and won $65 total). Not great, but I enjoy playing. I really need to free my time up and get down to the casinos one weekend! I haven't been back since July! ;-(

I worked a few hours Saturday and then worked out. I met up with a new friend for dinner & a movie. Let's call this one Rafter girl...to protect her identity...or could it be to protect me??? LOL

We went up to ....Athens.... to the movie theater up there. Yes, I little bit of a drive but we had some time to burn and I'm telling you what, the CRAP REGAL theaters here doesn’t compare. If you ever want to go up there, just head towards ....Athens.... and take the ....State Street.... exit...head into town and the theater will be on your right (Athena Grand). Stadium seating and cheap tickets/concessions.

The movie we saw SUCKED…The Box is a stupid movie! I'm not even going to waste your time or mine in describing why it was so bad. Just believe me that this at BEST is a RENTER! ;-)

Sunday I tried to catch up on some of my sleep deprivation! ;-) I had to be over at the Eagles around 1:30 for a Veteran's day ceremony. That was pretty neat...we had a guest speaker that had just completed a tour in ....Iraq..... He had a slide show of some of the pics they had taken. Those men and women deserve 100% of our support.

I'm really not looking forward to the rest of this week! ;-( Another long day tomorrow, and then meetings at the Eagles Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday night. Then I'll be back there Friday night, but under better circumstances...it'll be time to host another Eagle's poker game! OH YEAH! If you’re looking for a poker game, come on out…7 pm sharp.

I have a lot of fun running these games. Truth be told, if I could make comparable money to my current job, I would quit and become a full-time Pit-Boss! That would be so cool!!!

Well in closing, you'll see that my last post was edited. I guess nothing is as private as I would think anymore. The person that I was writing about asked me to remove identifying features about her from the blog.

I'm not out to cause anyone any trouble in this world (unless they started it!). This is just the place where I vent my frustrations, speak my mind, and have a small following of blog readers. I guess I'll need to be more careful on what information I put out here from now on.

If I continue to put my foot in my mouth, I'll have to close my blog down to friends only. I hate doing that because I know there are some people that don't have Myspace pages that read my blog and it would basically shut them out. And truth-be-known, this blog is the only reason I have a Myspace account anymore. I have pretty much quit updating my photos and stuff here and now do so only on Face Book. YEAH...go ahead and cyber stalk me on Face Book!!! :-) I'll close that one down too! ;-) I'm just kidding.

I hope your week goes quickly for you. HOW soon can I start my Vacation Countdown without it becoming annoying?

.. ..

Good nite all!!!

Good 1st date

Hey there everybody...by the time you read this it should be FRIIIIDAY! Finally the weekend has arrived once again!

I had my date with [edited at her request] tonight. All went well. No uncomfortable silences, which is always nice.

[edited at her request], work night for me, we just met up for dinner. We had some good conversations. She seemed really easy to talk to.

I can't say that we are the "perfect" match...but she spoke her mind and I spoke mine. It was so nice to talk with someone that I knew wasn't just saying what I wanted to hear...someone that was being truthful, whether I liked it or not.

I liked most of it...we realized early on that we won't be able to talk about politics! ;-) Let's just leave it at that...we are on the opposite side of the spectrum on that front.

But, she and I seemed to have similar stories concerning our past relationships. You know, where we meet someone and they have a job and seem to have their life in order, only to find out later that they have quit their job and are complete LOSERS! It was nice to meet someone from the same f'd up past.

My next date with [edited at her request] probably won't be until next weekend...I have a poker game this Friday and [edited at her request]. Hey, nothing wrong with taking a S-L-O-W approach for once! ;-)

In other news...I broke my guitar out of it's shipping box tonight before my date. Man, I really can't wait to start watching those DVD's and seeing if/how quickly I'm going to pick all of that up.

Tomorrow night is the monthly Yanok poker tourney. That is always a good time filled with friends, poker, beer, and usually some WILD behavior! ;-)

As for this weekend I really haven't made any plans...I may have to work some this weekend. My uncle wants me to help him rearrange some furniture in his house. Also we are having a Veteran's Day memorial celebration at the Eagles on Sunday at 2:00. There will be a Blackhawk helicopter doing a fly over...so that should be cool.

I booked my first cruise today! I can't FREAKING wait!!! It's a singles cruise and I really hope I have a lot of fun. It will be the week of my 30th birthday party, so I'm sure to have some FUN. Now the only problem for me is to STAY single until January 16th! LOL...who wants to go on a singles cruise and not be able to ACT singe! ;-)

Well, if you have read this far, again, I'm sorry for boring you! LOL

I seem to use this place to drain my thoughts and to clear my head. Some of you have seemed to enjoy it. Maybe it's because you enjoy reading about my f'd up life...maybe not...BUT I promise you I'll continue to post as long as you continue to read.

Good night everyone! I hope you all have a good...NO, a G-R-E-A-T weekend!!!

Hump day update

Hey everyone...I hope your hump day humps along quickly. ;-) I had a minute and wanted to put another post out here to update all of my faithful blog followers...whomever you all are! My personal life has been moving along nicely. I'm still dealing with some BS from Fairmont girl, but hopefully she has realized now that I'm not falling for her games anymore and will finally leave me alone. It's either that or I'm going to have to change my phone number, which will suck, but it may come to that. ;-( Halloween was a blast, I met a girl there and we had one dance, exchanged phone numbers, and she had to leave with her group. We texted back and forth on Sunday. It was nice to know that I still "had it" so to speak! ;-) Also I have been e-mail/texting a girl that my buddy's kid has as a teacher. She seems really nice! We have had a lot of conversations this week. We seem to have a lot in common, especially in what we are looking for in relationships. We have a dinner date on Thursday, so I'll be sure to tell you all how it goes. If nothing else, it will be a new friend to hang out with! ;-) I got my guitar in the mail yesterday, but sadly I had Presidential duties to attend to at the Eagles and I didn't get time to open it up. ;-( Like I said, things are looking better...thanks to all that have commented and for the words of inspiration. Things I'm looking forward to: 1. Date with teacher on Thursday 2. Poker tourneys at Yanok's on Friday 3. Starting to play my guitar this weekend 4. Eagles Poker tourney next Friday 5. 8-Night Singles Cruise in January!!! I have seen an increase in my blog readership...which means that either misery deserves company, or you really enjoy reading about my screwed up life! If there is anything you want me to blog about, just message me and I'll see what I can do. Talk to you later!!!

Psychic Reading

Hey everyone, I hope you had a great Halloween. Mine was fantastic; of course I’m paying for it now.

I went to a psychic yesterday…man was it cool. I’ve been to card readers before, but never to a psychic. This guys was scary accurate. He didn’t tell me everything that I wanted to hear, but perhaps what I needed to hear.

Two things that made it really stand out for me and led me to believe that this guy was legit. A few months ago a friend of mine that lives in Texas asked me if I was interested in a promotion…only downside was that I’d have to move to Texas. I kind of blew her off because I had just gotten back together with Fairmont girl (what a waste), but that has all been covered.

He started by asking if I was happy where I worked, I answered yes. He then asked if I was happy with the work I did, I said no. He asked if I have ever thought of moving for another job, I said yes. He then paused and said…They are telling me to tell you Texas! Of all the 50 states and he picks up on Texas! Way too cool.

Later he brought up one of my favorite quotes when we were talking about my relationships. He was telling me that I needed to play the field and not settle down for a few more years. He said that he saw me very happy in a relationship by the time I’m 32 and I would have 4 kids! He then said…They are telling me to tell you that it’s like buying a new car! I lost it! I have said for many years that marrying a woman without having sex is like buying a new car without test driving it. It was so freaky that he said that.

Other things he said were pretty cool. He said that I had such a bright future ahead of myself that most would be envious. He said he saw me living until I was at least 86, possible farther. He told me that I should focus on continuing my education because he saw me teaching in the near future.

He also said this area is like a magnet to me, holding me back from my true potential. So, I’m really going to start looking for jobs elsewhere. I can always retire back to Parkersburg if I wanted to.

And he was right about my relationships…I just need to take a step back and quit trying to control every aspect of my life. I just need to let happen what’s going to happen. No more looking for Ms. Right anymore! I’m back in test-drive mode! Lol

Thanks for reading everyone!

New toy!!!

Hey all, I hope things are going well for you and your families.

I think I've finally got the crazy EX out of my life. After I posted my last blog, she called, begged, pleaded, texted, etc. wanting me to give her another chance. Like the sucker I was I did because I didn't want to have any doubts about "what if".

WELL, now there is no doubt in my mind. That girl has Fairmont running through her veins and never planned to move down to Parkersburg with me. She wanted the single lifestyle during the week, and then the boyfriend/girlfriend situation on the weekends. The part-time thing was ok when I was 20, at 29 - IT'S OVER!

So...I was sitting at work today trying to figure out what kind of hobby that I was going to pick up and learn. I needed to find something to occupy my time so I wasn't thinking about Fairmont. I have always fancied myself a singer...not the best by any means, but I think what gives me an advantage is my memory when it comes to songs...I can retain lyrics like you wouldn't believe. After a few times listening to a song, I usually have it committed to memory.

But I never have learned how to play any instruments. I absolutely LOVE sitting around a bonfire and having a few buddies play guitar while we all sing. So...I ordered myself a new toy...a guitar! And not just a guitar, but all the necessities needed to teach myself how to play it, or so they claimed. It had good reviews online so it is worth a shot.

But I AM going to play the guitar. That's my early New Years goal. If this kit doesn't help me, I'll even start taking professional lessons. OR, god knows between all the guitar players I know, I'll buy them a few cases of beer and have them over every weekend, though I think my memory retention might suffer!

Basically I'm just trying to live for me again! I spent all summer under the false pretenses that I was spending my time with someone who was worth it. Now, that the truth is out, my summer is over and I need to find something to occupy my time. Though it is true that I have met some new friends already through Myspace/Facebook. I bolded friends because that's all they are! I'm not nor have I ever cheated on a girl before...and sadly I don't think she had it through her head yet that JR here isn't going to play her games anymore. But the new friends I have met seem awesome! One in particular we share SO much in common that it's scary! Funny side-bar: I about fell out of my chair this morning...I had e-mailed this person yesterday and she hadn't responded all day. NO BIGGIE! But this morning she e-mailed me and told me that she was really sorry for not responding earlier!!! OMG! I never got a sorry from my girl friend (Fairmont) whom never called or texted me back...and here's this girl that I am ONLY friends with (AND never met) and she's apologizing for not e-mailing me sooner! LOL That's one of the things that made me realize I was DONE with FAIRMONT!!!


BUT...BACK to the hobby thing...SURE! I'm still going to be playing poker. But there isn't always a game around here and the trips to Crosslanes and Wheeling can get boring (like driving to Fairmont)! LOL

My new toy should arrive by Friday of next week. I'm sure I'm going to be spending all next weekend attempting to learn to play! I'll post pics when I book my first gig...LOL...yeah right! ;-)

Well, thanks for reading everyone! It's time to hit the SACK!!!

Will the soap opera ever end???

Ok my blog followers...I know it's been awhile and I'm truly sorry for that. Needless to say that I have tended to use this blog as a way to vent my frustrations and life has been good lately, or so I thought. If you were a regular follower to my blog before, you may remember my last post about "fairmont girl" getting back in contact with me with some crazy excuse why she broke it off in the first place. As I sit here today, I can remember thinking back then... "JR - just run! You have this girl out of your head now, your life is looking better, you don't need this!!!" I didn't listen to that little voice of reason, but I should have! Honestly, I thought that this girl might actually be the one. For what possible reason would she have been calling me back in the first place? I hadn't stalked her, called her, or texted her: I left her alone when she told me that she was going back to her ex. Now I only wish that she would have let me believe that story. Over the last few months, I'll admit, she and I had a good time...but it was only part-time. We only spent weekends together, either here in P-burg or up in Fairmont. I stated when we started the relationship back up that I didn't want a long-distance relationship, to which she responded "I have nothing left in Fairmont". SO...I gave her a few months. And after wasting many weekends, I began to realize that she was never going to move to P-burg. Things started to not feel right to me...she used to call all the time, text me, want to hear from me...but suddenly that all stopped. I was always the one that had to initiate contact. I started to feel like she might have someone else taking up the free time that she used to spend on the phone or texting me. This past weekend I was up at the Fairmont Eagles to attend a conference. She was suppose to spent the whole weekend with me. She made it to the bar around 8:30 Friday night and I thought all was well. After the booze kicked in that night we both ended up getting in an argument over her mother (she wanted to wait and "help" her mother out with some stupid guy b.s. that was going down). I finally got her to leave with me at 2:00 am and we went back to the hotel. She grabbed all of her stuff and left. I thought we were over then! BUT NO...she started texting me around 5 am. She told me she would come see me Saturday morning and all would be well again. Well, as has been the case with her, I didn't see or hear from her at all Saturday morning. By 2:00 pm I decided to man up and drive by her ex's house...you guessed it ladies and gentleman...her car was there! This girl must have really thought that she could play me like that! So good bye you cold-hearted player! You did a very good job playing me for so long. I'm just glad that I finally wised up and can now move on with my life. I wish the last 3 months NEVER happened!!! Thanks for reading everyone! Expect more posts now! ;-)

Update - Days of my life...

Okay, so I've been debating on how I was going to approach this subject...I've decided that honesty is the best policy. So a few blog posts back you'll remember me talking about the days of my life, about me not knowing what was wrong with me, why I was the "Good Luck Chuck" of Parkersburg. Well, I guess it wasn't as bad as I thought... I got into to D.C. on Saturday night and was just chilling in my room, I had to work a very long day on Sunday. I got a text message from an unknown number asking me if I wanted to hear/read something funny. I responded that I wanted to know who this person was first. The response - "fairmont girl". You see, when I break up or am broken up with someone - I remove all of their contact info - this prevents any drunk texting or calling. Now you can just imagine all the things that were rushing through my head...the two prominent options were: 1. She's prego and texting me to tell me that I'm going to be a daddy (which wasn't going to go over well because she told me she went back to her EX) 2. She was texting me to tell me that her and her EX didn't work out and was wanting to start something back up with me (which wasn't going to happen - I'm not a rebound guy) But luckily it wasn't option 1, and option 2 never really was in the equation. SO.....why was she contacting me after almost a month???? Well...she never actually went back to her EX. Why tell me that she did? She was angry with me. She thought that I had given her an STD. She was trying to buy herself time until she could get tested and then confront me with the results. So three weeks later and the results were in...I didn't give her anything (I don't have anything to give). She had a birth control implant that had been moved (partly my fault [;-)]) and it caused her some pain and discomfort that mimicked some kind of STD. So all was forgiven by her - even though I didn't do anything! ;-) Yet I had to spend three weeks wondering what I had did wrong, why I was always driving women back to their EXs, and basically what was wrong with me! She has promised to make it up to me and not to lie to me again. She is still interested in seeing where our relationship could go and honestly so am I. I had already assumed that it wasn't going to go anywhere, so basically it will be like we are starting over. As my top friend said - "Only you Jr, Only you!" And she's right...this is a situation that COULD only happen to ME. I'm saving all this information for when they turn my life into a SOAP OPERA. ;-) So, again, "Like Sands Through The Hour Glass, So Are the Days of MY life." Thanks for reading!!!

30 before 30

Ok....TODAY is a big day for me!!! Maybe the best so far this year!!! You may remember a few months ago I starting running and dieting. No, I wasn't fat...I just didn't like the way I looked anymore. Plus I was starting to carry around a small keg in my belly. LOL When I turned 29 (January) I was the heaviest I had ever been in my life and I was NOT happy about it. I tipped the scales at 223, which yes, isn't that bad for someone 6'-2" but I could be considered over-weight. So in February I started busting my ass on the treadmill...and cutting WAY back on all the bad foods. Well today is the day that has made it ALL worth it! This morning, I weighed in at 193 pounds! A FULL 30 pounds lighter in just 5 months!!! That's a 13.5% drop in body weight! I am SO excited! My energy level is up! I'm more confident about the way I look. Life is SO good right now! It feels so good to set a goal and reach it. And I did it 100% honest! No pills, crazy diets, just hard work and cutting back on the sweets. Now it's time to set a new goal. I'm thinking 185 pounds is my new target weight. After that I'm going to start working out and toning up. I still don't have the six-pack that I wanted, but at least the keg is gone! LOL I'll keep you posted!

Nothing new

Hey there everybody.

It's been awhile since I've posting anything, I thought I should get on here and check in with everyone. I hope all is well with each and everyone of you.

Nothing really new going on in my life...and no women to complain about - can you believe it??? lol

I've finally gotten all the bad women out of my life and out of my head...it feels pretty good to just chill out now. No drama!

I've been really busy at work lately, which is making this month fly by for me. I'll be heading back to D.C. this Saturday for an entire week up there! I don't mind going up there. It's good to see some new sights and eat at new places.

I've really been debating about seriously looking for a job up there. I have nothing left to tie me to this town. If I were to go up there for 1 year, I could some back here and add a substantial amount of money to my pay check. All I have to do is 1 year in Hell...lol.

Another reason is that my buddy Keven tells me that the women up there are completely opposite of the scene down here. He said that it's RARE to find a woman under 30 that HAS A KID! Everyone up there is focusing on their careers, so most of them haven't had children yet. So moving to D.C. might be my best shot of finding my 'soul-mate'...yeah right! I know, I was just kidding.

But it wouldn' t be a bad thing to leave town for awhile. I always said I was back home to stay. But if I could better my life both financially and socially just by moving to D.C. for 1 year, why shouldn't it? IDK...time will tell. I'll be dropping hints to some of the big wigs up in D.C. while I'm up there! lol

I'm sure I'll post again when I get up there!

Take care everyone!

Days of my life...

Okay as promised - here's my 'Days of our Lives' story: Some of you make know that two weekends ago I went up to Fairmont and spent an awesome weekend with girl I had met the weekend before that. We had a really good time and I thougt things could get serious. On July 4th she was suppose to come down and go four wheeler riding with me and my friends from PA. Well all day Friday I was getting blown off by this girl. This isn't my first rodeo, I knew what was going on. On Saturday I didn't even try to call or text her. My friends had driven all the way from PA - 8 hour trip - to have a good time. I was going to make sure they did. Around 2, when I hit Grantsville, my cell phone when crazy with text messgaes from her. She was going back to her ex - yada yada yada. Same old story - just change the main characters. I didn't respond to her until I got back on Sunday. I really wanted to know WTF was going on with me! Am I the Dane Cook of P-burg? If you haven't seen Good Luck Chuck or My Best Friends Girl - then you won't get that joke. But honestly - that's how I feel. Either I date a girl and she RUNs back to her EX or they find Mr. Right-after-Me and get married. Maybe I should start charging for my services. This shit is getting really old. Anyway - said girl tried the normal lines - not you, it's me. I was supposedly perfect, not like the asshole she went back to that only made time to see her once a year! I'm not joking! She said the last time she seen him was in April of 2008! So someone else will have to explain that one to me. When I was being an ass with my responses to her - she even commented "Don't do that! We had a connection and I know you felt it!". OMG! And WTF! She must think I'm going to play her games or beg for her like jackass was. Nope! I will beg for no one. So - another one bites the dust. Good bye yet another twisted bitch! There I feel better now! ;-) You would think that I would be getting used to this by now, maybe a few more and I will. ;-( So in closing - "Like sands thru the hour glass, so our the days of our lives!" Take care!

DC so far...

Well my trip to DC has been good thus far. I took off from P-burg around 7 am yesterday and had a pretty non-eventful drive. I was even able to squeeze in a little shopping at the Prime Outlet malls in Hagerstown I love hitting the Hager store there to stock up on business casual attire. Also made a trip into the Sketcher store. I made it into DC around 1 and got checked into my hotel. I had to go into the office for a few hours. Around 4:30 I was back in my hotel and, though I was extremely tired, convinced myself to go and run in the gym there. I managed to push myself harder than I ever have - I ran faster and longer than ever before! Some of that has to do with my current anger/frustration build up...more on that in another post. After my run I really wasn't ready to go back to my room, so I went for a walk. I really haven't seen many of the DC sights since I visited here in 5th grade. I walked about 5 files around town - I got picks of the Washington Monument, the State Capital, Museum of Natural History, and few others I can't remember. Today was a full day of work. I got off at the same time as yesterday and pushed myself to repeat my run like yesterday. Man am I sore - but hey, it's helping with the feelings I mentioned earlier. They have a pool next to the gym, so after running I took a quick shower to rinse off then swam and relaxed for about 30 mins. Back to the room to shower, and now I'm on my way to Crystal City mall to stop by the Apple Store, Best Buy, Virgini Tobacco Company, and whatever else cool store catches my eye. I'm REALLY looking forward to drinking a beer while I wait for my pizza at California Pizza Place! If you've never had one of their pizzas, then you're missing out. Tomorrow is work as normal. I probably won't get into too much at night. Same goes for work on Thursday. However, Thursday evening I'm meeting up with an old Army buddy of mine for dinner and drinks. His wife is out of town this week so who knows where we'll end up before the night is through! Let's hope I get some pictures - no matter what I get in to!!! ;-) Well, I'm at my stop now. I promise to work on the other post that I mentioned on my train ride back. Thanks for reading. Hope all is well with you!!!

My weekend recap

All I can say is wow!

This weekend the Parkersburg Aerie Eagles hosted the WV State Eagles Convention. There were folks visiting from all over this great state. And of course, after being installed at the new Worthy President, I had to make sure I represented my office well this weekend. I think I did, and I was told I did.

It all started out on Thursday night. This is when most of the 'delegates' or folks form others Aerie's made the trip to Parkersburg. I didn't drink 'much' that night, if only for the fact that I had worked all day and I knew I had to be back at 10:00 am for the opening ceremonies. Lucky, I was able to move my off day around and take Friday off.

On Friday morning we had our opening ceremony, where the VFW came and present our flag. We also heard from the Parkersbur Fire Cheif, the Wood County Sherrif, and the WV State Auditor. I'll admit that at this point of the day I was kind of uneasy. There probably wasn't 5 people in the room within 20 years of my age.

Our official duties ended around 3:00 and I rushed home to get a nap in before the men's dinner at 6:00. Man was that fun!!! Open bar from 6:00-6:30 followed by grilled ribeyes. Here's where my comfort level began to return to normal. These guys were impressed that we had a young guy that was willing to step up and help out in his club. They were actually excited to see it!

After the dinner we all retired to the social room where everyone drank to our hearts desire. At 11:00 Chris and I retired to the 'hospitality' room at the Knight's Inn where there was another open bar from 11:00-1:00. Man, can these 'seniors' drink! lol

I made it home around 1:30 Saturday morning, only to get back up at 8:30 in time to get decked out in my 'Sunday's' best and get back to the club by 9:30 for another meeting. This one wasn't as long and I was on my way out the door around 2:00.

I went striat back home for some more R&R, only to return to the club by 5:00 for the joint dinner at 6:00. Here's where I laid eyes on a very sexy girl at the bar on my way into the banquet room. I jokingly mentioned to one the the bartenders that I wanted her name and number! More on this later...

The banquet went well, but a little drawn out. This person, thanking that person, this person, wishing this person well, etc. I couldn't get up and leave. I had my office to uphold.

The banquet ended by 7:30 and we all headed to the bar for more drinking (do you see the pattern here?). When I got to the bar, the bartender I was speaking to earlier said "Hey - that lady over there wants to meet our President". That lady was none other than that very sexy girl that was sitting at the bar earlier! I could not beleive it! How could she want to meet me??? ;-?

She had a few 'older' men hanging around her for most of the evening. I never felt comfortable enough to go up and talk to her. While I was making my rounds introducing myself to the 'delegates' and guests, she walked up behind my and introduced herself! I loved that!

Well, once that I found out that the 'older' men were her mom's boyfriend and family friends, I spent the rest of my evening over there talking with her and getting to know her. She has to rank in my top 3 most b-e-a-utiful women I've ever had a chance to talk to - at least in my 'are-we-interested' state of mind.

Alright, no more about her - I'll just leave it at this - I'm going to Fairmont this weekend to take this girl out! SMOKING!!! ;-)

Today I once again had to make it up to the club to say my good-byes to all the vistors and 'delegates'. I think I made it home around 1 or so and immediately took a 2 hour nap. When I woke up I headed to town to pick up some supplies and Big Red texted me and told me not to eat dinner, that Brian was picking up steaks to grill out and wanted me to come over and swim.

I got over there aorund 5:30, swam for a few hours, at a kick-butt steak, then watched episode 2 of season 2 of True Blood!!! OH YEAH baby! Bring this new season on! I absolutely love this show!

So now that I've typed all of this out (and no doubtedly bored you to death) I'm sitting here nodding off to sleep.

Good night all and thanks again for reading!!!

Take care!

I LOVE MY LIFE

A little freaked out...

Okay - so I've asked all who is reading my rantings and ravings to add me as a friend, but I've only had a few responses...
Yet, there were 8 readers today alone - 17 since yesterday!
WHO are all you people! LOL
I know all my friends don't get on here and read this stuff....so why aren't you adding me as a friend?

OK - let's put it this way - send me a message and/or add me as a friend if you want to continue following my life stories....I'm seriously thinking about turning this blog into 'Friend's only'. Sorry, but I don't know who's reading and it's freaking me out! LOL

To all my regular readers that are my friends already - I apologize...I just really want to know where all of these readers are coming from!

Unless the old saying is true - "Curiosity killed the cat"! Then I don't want to know.

Take care everyone! Have a good night!

I love my life...

What a great end to an awesome weekend...I just got back from hanging out at the Wolfe's house watching the Season 2 premier of True Blood. More on that later.

My weekend started out with the normal list of chores...I mowed grass Saturday, cleaned up around the house, etc. I then headed over to the Eagles to grab a bite to eat and get my drinking started early. Actually I had been drinking since 1ish, when I was mowing.
I ate a good steak at the club and drank 1 pitcher of beer before the Murray's got there and provided me with some drinking buddies.
After they drank their bucket, we headed to my house to ditch my truck, then headed to Six Pence to listen to Jinx'd rock out!!! I really enjoyed the band that nite. They learned my new favorite song "Hate My Life" a few weeks ago and I managed to talk them into singing it during the first set. I love that song and they do a great job singing it.
The beer continued to flow as we jammed to the band...there was even a new bartender there that was SMOKING HOT! Funny story there...earlier in the evening Big Red and I were outside the bar smoking...and we were commenting on a purple van parked there. Our buddy JJ drived a purple van, Red calls it his 'Barney Mobile'. While we were making fun of it, this hot chick comes over and gives us grief for picking on her van! lol It was too funny. Later in the evening, it comes to find out that she is our bartender for the nite. But sadly, she has a boyfriend, so I didn't do any major persuing last nite! ;-( But it's always nice to mingle!
By mid-night I was so drunk that I knew I was going to be sick...but as everyone else was still in the partying mood, I said my goodbyes and walked home (it only took me 10 minutes to get there)...I like living close to bars like that.
I woke up this morning feeling horribly hung-over. I even thru-up around 11 am. So I knew I was pretty trashed last nite. I didn't have much hopes of having a productive day today.
I grabbed a quick bite to eat, took a shower, then headed to work for a few hours. I actually had an enjoyable time at work today. 3 hours of undisturbed peace and quiet. I was able to get a lot done. Plus, I sort of restored some of my interest in the job. Lately it had be lacking - we haven't exactly been doing the type of work that I signed up for. But today was the type of work that I enjoy doing. This week should be a great week for me!
After a quick stop at Tracey's to catch up, I headed out to the Wolfe's around 8ish to meet up with them and the Murrays to watch the season premier of Season 2 of True Blood. The show picked up right where it left off. I really enjoyed the show, and of course there are more twists and story lines to follow. I'm really going to enjoy our new Sunday True Blood parties.
Now after all this ranting and raving, you're probably wondering why my Subject line says "I love my life...".
While I was sitting there watching tv tonite, I was reflecting on the weekend past and I realized that I have a really good life! I know I've been down in the dumps lately, kind of self-loating pissed at the world attitude. But sitting there with my good friends (all of whom went out last nite with me) I realized that I am truely lucky to have them! I also have a great job, great family, nice things to call my own! Yes, I may not have the girl friend part worked out - but so what! I have so much else to be thankful for!
So here's to you my good friends - THANKS for being there for me!

I really do love my life!!!

I really hope I can keep up this good attitude for the week ahead! ;-)

Take care everybody! Thanks again for reading!

No reason!

Hey there blogites: I saw where I had over 20 visitors to the blog since yesterday I just wanted to write and say thank you for your support! It does help knowing that my ranting and ravings are enjoyed by you! If you're reading this and not on my friends list, then please add me! For whatever reason, I'm glad you're reading! Now on to the blogging: Today was work as normal. I set my alarm for 5:50 with a goal of getting to work by 6:30, of course a few snoozes later and I rolled into work at 8:30. I did my normal 3+ mile run at lunch! Then I headed to the tanning bed - hey, my top friend on here told me to start going, so I did! Now I'm tanner than her! LOL Then I met up with the Murrays and Brothers over at the Eagles for the Fish Fry and BEER! ;-) Brian and I ended the nite by ourselves. Now that I'm Pres over there, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to just drink and relax there! Everyone has a problem and/or complaint that they think the Pres can fix. I guess I'll need to find another place to get drunk and relax! I'm only kidding! It's a great club and I want it to do great! Well, I better get to bed! Back to the grind tomorrow! Thanks for reading everyone! Again, add me if I'm not already your friend! Take care!

Clear the air

Okay ladies: I'm calling a truce! In the last few days I've been called an ass, arrogant, selfish, coinceeded, etc. I a few of those things yes, let's be honest, I never was 'Prince Charming' or anything! ;-) I have been ranting on here about playing and hating, and those friends that truely know me, know that it's all talk on my part! A friend told me that I'd be back to 'Prince Charming' before too long! That I just needed to rant and rave and get those horrible relationships from my past out of my head! And she's right, I'll be back to my 'door mat' ways before too long! But there I go again, being my arrogant, selfish, ass again! But seriously, I don't harbor anymore hard feelings towards the ladies anymore! Not that I ever did anyways to all you ladies on my friends list! A few of you have really helped me get through my last few head cases that I've dated. I swear I must attract them! ;-) Even still, some of you have been there for me for a LONG time! You know who you are! I really appreciate your support! If it weren't for all of you, I don't know where I'd be right now. For those of you that remember 6-7 years ago, without your support, I'd prolly be married living a horrible life in Germany right now! OMG! I don't even want to think about that! ;-) Thanks again! ;-) Peace out!

Poker!

Well I had a great turn out at the Eagles tonight. It wasn't our record of 41, but second place ain't always that bad - we had 35 degenerate gamblers come and play.

I actually forced myself to play this time. The past three months I felt too over whelmed to play because of all the stress involved with making sure the tourney runs smoothly.

I just felt more at ease tonight, so I decided to play. I ended up cashing in 5th place for $35 and also snagging 3 $5 bounty chips. So I doubled my money for the night and was able to play some POKER for the first time in a few weeks.

There were a lot of new players here tonight...which means that the word is growing. I did like a comments from a guy that has been to a few of these games by now...he said that my game is the best run game in Parkersburg. That made me feel really good. I take a lot of pride out of everything that I do! So the fact that I have 35-40 people showing up and expecting me to provide them with entertainment and amusement is AWESOME!

I would love to be a tournament director in Vegas. I don't know why, I'm really not a bad poker player, but I just enjoy managing the tourneys...who knows maybe one day I'll be able to run larger games.

Well, I'm in desperate need of some sleep.

I see that there have been MANY more blog readers...so either 1 person is reading my blog OVER and OVER again, or people are actually starting to catch on to my ONLINE DIARY!

I hope you all have a GREAT weekend!

Take care!

One last time!

Ok, so today I'm told by a 'friend' that I've been too negative on here toward women. This 'friend' said I need to "be a lover, not a figher".

That's a bunch of B.S. women and you know it!

The 'lover' is left alone at the bar while the woman goes home with the 'fighter'! I've seen it and experienced it way too many times!

Remember - your sex started this (read the prior blogs)! I'm just going on the offense for the first time in my life!

I'm done allowing women to live with me , paying for their bills , supporting them while they go to school , etc. I'm no longer an 'easy mark' to be played like a violin .

I want to enjoy my time on this planet, not be miserable and obsessed with finding 'Ms. Right'.

Why was I in the first place? Who knows!

Maybe because that was what was expected of me! Put yourself in my shoes:

I had a great 4-year military career,
I graduated from college in the top 10% of my class
I have a job, with GREAT pay, benefits, time off etc
I own my own home (3 bedrooms with plenty of room for a family)
I own an awesome truck and four-wheeler
I am athletic (been running 3+ miles 3-4 times a week)
I am healthy (lost 10% of my body weight in 4 months)
I am in the best shape of my life since I was in basic training
and I was just elected President of the Parkersburg Eagles (no small feat).

But yet, what do I get asked EVERY single time I run into family or friends whom I haven't see in awhile?

"Are you married yet?"

Are you f*ing kidding me?

With all my accomplishments, worldly possessions, good friends that I've met -- it's still not enough that I haven't been married yet!!!!

So maybe that will explain to everyone why I'm not looking for Ms. Right anymore....just Ms. Right-now (if even that).

Oh, and to top it all off this 'friend' just told me that they had been told that I'm an 'ass'. I mean honestly! Of course this 'friend' wouldn't tell me who told them that. All I know it was a man AND a women. I didn't have the heart to tell this 'friend' what I've heard about them. I just closed out of the text message box and will delete them from my friends on Myspace. I don't like having false facts dangled in front of me like a carrot.

I've been very nice to women in my past. TOO NICE! That is my problem. But I guess the rumors have already started - I'm an 'ASS'! Watch out!

If I'm an 'ass' so much, why have I had 2 ex's in the last two months e-mail me and try to get me to go back out with them? It doesn't matter! I am an 'ass' this summer! That's fine, I can deal with that!

If this doesn't make sense to you, then you should just delete me as your friend from Myspace and I won't bother you anymore! But this blog will continue!

Thanks for reading to all of my 'true' friends and family!

LOVE YOU ALL!

Tell me about yourself - survey

Name: Jr.
Birthday: January 23rd
Birthplace: Parkersburg, WV
Current Location: Parkersburg, WV
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Blonde
Height: 6'-2"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: West Virginia - been in Virginia since 1700's.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Sandles
Your Weakness: Beer
Your Fears: Dying alone
Your Perfect Pizza: Lots of veggies and meats
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Stay single through 30
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: WTF
Thoughts First Waking Up: Do I really have to work today?
Your Best Physical Feature: Been told my lips and/or eyes
Your Bedtime: when I'm tired
Your Most Missed Memory: always miss Vegas!
Pepsi or Coke: Diet Pepsi
MacDonalds or Burger King: McD's
Single or Group Dates: Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: I hate both
Do you Smoke: Cigars, sometimes
Do you Swear: Yes
Do you Sing: Yes
Do you Shower Daily: sometimes twice
Have you Been in Love: Lust
Do you want to go to College: Did that
Do you want to get Married: Not anytime soon
Do you belive in yourself: Always
Do you get Motion Sickness: No
Do you think you are Attractive: Getting there
Are you a Health Freak: I work out - but I do that so I can enjoy food/ber
Do you get along with your Parents: with my mom
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes
Do you play an Instrument: No
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes
In the past month have you Smoked: Yes
In the past month have you been on Drugs: No
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No
In the past month have you been on Stage: No
In the past month have you been Dumped: Yes
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No
Ever been Drunk: Yes
Ever been called a Tease: Yes
Ever been Beaten up: No
Ever Shoplifted: Yes
How do you want to Die: In a blaze of glory
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: professional poker player
What country would you most like to Visit: Australia
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Blue
Favourite Hair Color: Blonde
Short or Long Hair: Longer
Height: Close to me
Weight: smaller than me
Best Clothing Style: Preppy
Number of Drugs I have taken: 1
Number of CDs I own: Can't count
Number of Piercings: 1
Number of Tattoos: 2
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Just 1 - I shouldn't ignore the writing on the walls!!!

Keith Urban Concert

Big Red, Brian, Laura, and I headed down to Charleston last night to watch Keith Urban and the Zac Brown Band.

What an awesome concert! I wasn't too sure that I would enjoy it. Why would I go then? Well, for one, nothing else better to do. Two, my friends were doing it! And Three, I know Keith was going to bring out the ladies! And did he ever!

I knew I was going to have a good night when Brian and I first got to our seats. Red and Laura had separate seats closer (but it wouldn't matter later). Any way, I digress...After Brian and I got our beers and made it to our seats, luck would have it that I got to sit next to two b-e-a-utiful women! I know at least one was married, but it was more about the company than anything else! ;-)

There was plenty of eye candy to see there! And Keith put on one hell of a concert. I am now truely a fan of his! He gave it all he got! And brought out all the pretty women of the area for my eyes to feast on!

Last night opened my eyes to the fact that maybe I should stay single for as long as possible! It was so much fun last night, just being on the prowl so to speak. Remind me why I was so ate up with getting tied down? As a Sammy Kershaw puts it "Honey, I'm fit to be tied down". Well, I'm not right now! ;-)

Check the pics out that I got posted! A few of you wanted some butt shots of Keith, others wanted some of him jamming on his guitar. I was able to get real close and get some good pics.

Thanks for reading and commenting!